feeling so winey.......
i just really wanna feel better - i was healthy on friday....all set for a new start at the club on monday........but then i did what i knew i should not have done - and ended up with a major setback.....now i need to recover all over again.....this is stupid
moreover it's disconcerting to learn that there are people out there that think i am being ridiculous. that i brought this on myself.......yes, truth be told. i DID bring it on myself. i disobeyed doctor's orders. and put myself at risk. i played roulette with my health over and over again.....and i finally lost.
the thing that these people don't seem to realize is that i did not do this for my own personal gain. i did not do it for money or fancy clothes/jewels or fame.........i did it to help others. an for that i am punished and ridiculed......
and because of that i am winey....
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